From the sawmills to the farmyard, with undertones of burning turf and old leather, it’s stylishly unrefined. And for those dessert enthusiasts, there’s even a dollop of molasses in there to sweeten the deal.

Oh dear. I think things got a bit out of hand... Apparently tastes include SPUNK (jizz), PR@WNS!!!, the lack of fish and 'like standing on the side of the road under the Botswana sun waiting for a car that will never come'.

Those savoury thoughts expand out to mid-Century Scandinavian rosewood unpolished furniture, the feeling of a recently blown out match on the tongue and an olive oily texture (no, we weren't drunk, promise.).

But, oh no! What's this? It's only Inappropriate Culturally-mis-matching Pudding Man! "I see you're enjoying a nice Japanese bath! Here, have some crème caramel and Christmas pudding, you idiot!". He then faded into the steamy evening, with only the slowly receding clip-clop...

Hmm, this is a young whisky, but does that explain the whiff of teenage boys’ aftershave? Oh no, I see, it’s just Chad Kroeger, munching on a mars bar.